


the life of tony stark (between the snaps)

by ravens_tell_stories



Category: Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Gen, I just rewatched endgame and got lots of feels, Lots of Angst, So much angst, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Tony Stark has PTSD, but seriously, i left it open-ended so you can choose to read it as he died or he didn’t, so here’s this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-02
Updated: 2020-06-02
Packaged: 2021-03-03 22:07:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 772
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24502855
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ravens_tell_stories/pseuds/ravens_tell_stories
Summary: He doesn’t think about the kid.And then he does.And then he can’t stop.~~endgame-induced irondad feels. Basically just 800 words of how Tony copes with losing peter, set between Thanos’ and Tony’s snaps.
Relationships: Tony Stark & Morgan Stark, Tony Stark & Peter Parker, Tony Stark/Pepper Potts
Comments: 3
Kudos: 19





	the life of tony stark (between the snaps)

**Author's Note:**

> heyyy! This is my first avengers fanfic, and also my first ever fanfic on Ao3. I wrote it in like less than half an hour sooo idk if it’s any good but I had feels and I felt like writing it. Also, I want to get a feel for how this website works since I’m currently working on another couple one-shots that I want to post but since neither of them are done, I’m starting with this one.
> 
> Thanks for checking this out, feel free to leave comments/kudos if you enjoy!

He doesn’t think about the kid.  
He gets pissed at Strange, and at Thanos, and at Quill.  
He doesn’t think about the kid.  
He fixes the ship and he and the blue girl get out to space and he tries to teach her how to live, even though they both know it’s only for a few weeks at most.  
He doesn’t let himself think about the kid.  
In the last few days, when their time is running out, it’s not the dying that scares him. It’s not the hurting, or the weakness, that makes his voice shake and tremble when he records a message for Pep.  
(He doesn’t think about the kid.)  
No, what scares him is the helplessness. He knows they’re dying, and there’s nothing he can do about it. Just like there was nothing he could do to stop Quill, or to stop Strange, or to stop Thanos, or to save—  
He doesn’t think about the kid.  
He doesn’t think about the kid, until there’s nothing else left for him to think about. Until he’s explored every possible way that fight could have gone, every possible way he can see to get out of this alive.  
Every reason he know they can’t get out of this alive.  
He doesn’t think about the kid.  
And then he does.  
And then he can’t stop.  
It’s why his first words when he steps off that ship are what they are - I lost the kid - because it’s all he’s been able to think of since he closed his eyes to die and allowed himself to remember stuttering rambles and curled chocolate hair and pleading doe eyes.  
When he gets home, after Cap and Nat and everyone else went and they tried and they failed, after he can finally stand on his own two feet again, he cleans.  
He spends days (weeks, months, years) cleaning every inch of every room that he owns, because at the very beginning he got some dust on his hands and suddenly he couldn’t breathe couldn’t think couldn’t hear couldn’t—  
So he cleans.  
And he tries not to think about the kid.  
The first time Morgan’s sick, she’s only three years old. She toddles around for half a day, looking peaky, until eventually in the early afternoon she stumbles into his legs, and murmurs to his kneecaps, “I don’t feel so good.”  
He doesn’t remember the rest of that day.  
Later, Pepper tells him he collapsed, which honestly sounds about right.  
He thinks about the kid.  
He sits down, and he puts Morgan on his lap, and he rocks her back and forth and tells her about the kid. His kid.  
Her brother.  
After that, Morgan asks for stories about him every night.  
It takes another year to be able to say his name. He tries, almost every day, but it’s too much. He can’t. Until, one day, he can.  
He’s watching Morgan mess around with some old junk in the garage. She has a spot of grease in her (chocolate) hair, and she looks up and beams at him, and he blurts—  
“You look like Peter.”  
And she tilts her head to the side and asks, “Peter?”  
He braces himself on the table, waiting for the terror and the memories and the horrible sadness, but they don’t come.  
He’s hit with grief, and longing, but mostly with fondness for the little girl in front of him.  
And it fucking terrifies him.  
He shakes his head and sits down, heavily, and Morgan walks over and asks if he’s okay, and he laughs.  
He laughs and says, “No, Morgan, not really.”  
She runs off and a minute later Pepper is there, Pepper, his Pepper, and she’s whispering to him that it’s okay, and he’s okay, and everything’s going to be okay.  
That night, he thinks about the kid.  
And he talks to Pepper about the kid.  
And a few weeks later, he feels okay enough again to sit Morgan down and tell her about Peter. About how smart he is, and how righteous, and how pure. He tells her that Petey, her brother, one time got a building dropped on him and then saved himself all on his own.  
And that’s how it goes, for another year.  
But then everything happens.  
His old team shows up, and tells him that they have a chance. A chance to fix it.  
But, for once, he doesn’t think about the kid. He thinks about his daughter. He says no.  
Until he doesn’t.  
Until he thinks about the kid.  
So he does it. And it works. And they win.  
And he sees his kid again.


End file.
